SELF CARE. Who has heard of it? Maybe it’s just me, but when I hear self care, I hear Aziz Ansari in my head saying, “Treat yo self!”
I understand self care and treat yo self sound like very different concepts. However, they both have the word self. I want to dive into the concept of self care and the buzzing craze that it is. With this challenge, I want to provide a new spin to something we hear a lot about.
First, let’s break down what exactly self care is. Self care is taking the responsibility to personally care for yourself. You have to spend time thinking about how you view yourself and if you feel you are worthy of taking care of. I say HECK YES. And I get it, I am a Marriage and Family Therapist so therefore I preach SELF CARE. But self care can be intimidating to start, and there isn’t one recipe for everyone to follow. I’m sure you’re thinking “But, like, what the actual heck does that mean and look like for me?!” And that’s what this is for. So let’s talk about it!
My definition is taking time to sit and learn from what I am avoiding, what I am stewing on and taking time to refill my cup. It has been a trial and error process. Some of the things I thought were filling turned out to be more draining. So take time to create a definition for your #selfcarechallenge. You have every ounce of permission to have a different definition than me and explore what is filling to you. In fact, you should have a different definition that fits your style of refilling your cup! We will be posting throughout this challenge to give food for thought as you create your definition!
As I’ve delved deeper into my #selfcarechallenge, I have discovered my self care plan is to learn about myself, learn something new, read something new, and engage in a new topic. Through this process, I have been currently learning about the varying types of self care. There are eight domains that self care falls into. The domains are a good place to start:
1. Spiritual
2. Contextual
3. Physical
4. Emotional
5. Relational
6. Intellectual
7. Sensual
8. Nutritional
And as I have been identifying what each type looks like for me, I’ve decided that part of my self care is binge watching Netflix (aka Parks and Rec), drinking copious amounts of coffee, taking long walks Downtown, and naps. However, if I don’t have self care activities representing each domain from above, I am not going to feel fully rested. Then I realize I am not spending time in all the domains. When I am only paying attention to relational self care I am short with the people I care about, I become lost in comparison, the running voice telling me I am not enough is LOUD and on loop to the point I begin to believe it. I have to create space to check in with myself and be honest as to where my self care is and if I have been ignoring one of the domains. I know I need to have representation of each of these in order to feel fully rested. These look like getting exercise, eating fresh veggies, journaling, getting outside, reading a book that is introducing me to a new perspective, and trying something new. All of these are a part of my balanced self care. When I have been devoting time to my whole self care I feel known in my relationships, I don’t feel like I am hiding my insecurities, I have a greater sense of gratitude.
As the brilliant Ron Swanson says, “Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.” Our self care is a serious deal, we cannot half ass it.
You are worthy of self care and deserving of taking the time to explore what fills your cup.
So my question to you...What is going to be your new #selfcarechallenge? What’s something that’s been on your list? And let’s be real, have ya been avoiding it? Is it a new workout class, a hard conversation with a friend/family member, or just getting outside to smell the fresh air? I want you to do something!
You know yourself best. Do what you need to do to love yourself. But do not believe the lie you are doing this alone. Let’s join forces and capture the moment and share with each other the new self care challenges we come up with!
fellow learner, dani